Friday, December 11, 2009

piggie bank me.

the thing i hate most about break ups: the way it leaves me with zero level of self-confidence, thank you.

i've ended my previous relationship for more than a month now, and i cant help but notice a similar pattern of thinking that i tend to have. now, i feel good going out with friends, but i cant help but feel OVER self-conscious around them. deciding on my outfit is hell for me. i feel fat all the time. i feel ugly, and when i open my closet which is full of garments, i still end up being depressed about having nothing to wear. yesss, my wardrobe needs to be updated now. but that will leave me being broke. i already am anyway. so please, money. can u start growing on trees now?

i used to not care so much about how my hair looked like, my body, my skin, the way i speak, EVERYTHING. i used to just 'go with the flow', so they say. but now, I AM OBSESSED with my looks. i just wanna look prettier. is that wrong? just so that i could feel good about myself once again. i dont wanna look in the mirror and feel like a total shit. (ouh yeah, i feel that way now.)

so friends, i need help. maybe u can suggest wht i should do with my hair to begin with. and NO. i dont wanna cut it short, i'll look like a FAT PIG having a mini wig then. well, u know wht i mean. ;)

4 comments:

meanie ninie said...

well, my advice: just be the person you had been all along!

i know ur self-conciousness is taking over,but if it makes you, "not you", then just let it go.. besides,people befriends with you for who you are kan? :) *hugs*
p/s: you're pretty dah darling,trust me. ;)

Nur Shakhina Ahmad said...

yeah,that make total sense to me, aunt. i'm being ridiculous again, yeah?

ahh. u all should come be with me everyday and tell me i'm pretty. hahahahahaa. ;))

Fifi Hanie said...

hah. the last time i had a real heart-to-heart relationship was almost what? like, 7 or 8 months ago. and yet its still taking its toll on me.

my tip fo u is, google gmbr awek cantek. buat mereka jd idola. haha. thats wht i did...still doing...tsk.

sng ckp, find an inspiration. when u r inspired, life gets much easier.

fo ur hair, apa jd pun, don't get bangs.

Nur Shakhina Ahmad said...

haha. bangs make me look more chubby and round. skang ni nk pinjam hanis zalikha jd idola la. ;)