Saturday, September 29, 2012

I need romance too!

I'm still writing this post despite all those pile of assignments needed to be done soon. Why? because I've just finished watching the second season of the drama I Need Romance. This season is far more awesome than the first one! I just love it!

Best couple ever! My favorite couple now, so real, less drama factor. :) 

Abang Jin Wook handsome. Me likeyyy. ;)

Not so typical love triangle. Hee.
Enough said. 

Will you?

Love me warmly, like rays of sunlight on a very cold day. Love me with courage, tell the world how much of an important person I am to you. Love me with passion, as hot as fire can be. Love me whole-heartedly, for when there're holes and cracks your love will never lessen. Love me for me, the childish, attention-seeking, self-centered me. Love me more than I've ever loved you, that hurting me will be twice as painful to you. Love me at my best, love me at my worse, thunderstorm-y day. Love me. Love me. Love me.
Will you?

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Royale La Magnificience

As promised, the pictures that we've all been waiting for? Hehe. Feast your eyes!
All five of us. :)

Been looking everywhere for pictures with Syu. So beautiful that night!

The infamous wedding photo with Bambam. Luls. Xp 

Mengumpat lettew~

Selfcam! :)

This happened when we were bored. Hee.

Our group photo, minus Syu who left early. :(

Tiga serangkai photo time! Love my babes. :*

All the girls, complete set. :D Love you guys long time.

My date that night, Biana. 

Sofea sayang comel! We met after all the hecticness, finally. :)

Three bored stooges. 

So, that was bits and pieces of the ball I grabbed from Bambam's and Mimo's albums. It was a night full of events, expected and unexpected. The ball itself was so so, but spending quality time with my precious ones is priceless. I loved the thrill nearing to the ball, where we were all excited looking for gowns, shoes, accesorries, etc. And I loved the fact that the boys dressed up for the ball, so handsome, thumbs up! :) Although I missed grabbing 'him' for a photo, I settled with watching his huggy photo with B. Okay teary-eyes now. THAT SHOULD BE ME!

No room for regrets now, its all in the past anyway. I'll be sure to stare at the both of you when class starts next week. Just to clarify whether you guys are dating, or what not. Funny me.

Moving on to more exciting things, I am now officially a nigga! I just got back from my Perhentian trip with love. It was AWESOME! I'm still waiting for the pictures to be uploaded though, then I'll be updating. Hee. Be prepared to see the sun-burned me. :)

Till then, these fast fingers are gonna work their magic on late reports to be submitted!

In regards of MAB

Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.
Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Thursday, September 20, 2012

MAB 2012

The Monash Annual Ball 2012 is coming soon! Less than 24 hours before the ball. Are you guys ready?

Am I ready?

Dress, check. Heels, check. Clutch, check. Hair and makeup, check. Date, sorta check?

Now I'm rushing through assignments to get ready in time for the ball tomorrow! :)

Just a preview. There'll be more coming soon. 

Pardon the fat me though. I failed my diet plan!

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Post le birthday

And so, the day I was anxiously trying to avoid come and go. It is now three days after my birthday, and I feel pretty much the same. Getting older is just adding another 1 to my previous 20 years of life.

My birthday was the same as every other day of the year. After receiving my birthday presents from Mimo and Lilo, I was busy with reports which will soon be due at that time. I didn't even have a photo of me on my birthday, a living proof to how ordinary my day was. Hehe, the girls and I did went to watch Alice in Resident Evil: Retribution though. Even the movie was being so ordinary, less than what I'd expected it to be. I hope the next movie in this series will be so much better, I hope it'll have more zombies actions!

Enough of that.

This year, I treated myself for a change. Treated myself to my own birthday cake, own presents, my own secret little party, by myself. It wasn't that bad afterall. Makes me love myself even more. :) The only person who knows my happy times, sad times, tired times, and the only one who understands me, is well, me. My awesome self deserves a reward for being so awesome! Hence, the reason I spent a lil bit more money on myself for my birthday.

Since I have lots of times going around by myself these days, I have plenty of time to think. For once, not to think about anything else, anyone else, but me. I reflected a lot on my self-worth, how others view me, how much do I mean to them, who'll be there for me eventually, how have I lived up till now, yada yada yada. Some questions I can answer, some still left me wondering.

In the 21 years that I've been living, I've lived not staying true to myself. I've lived walking on egg shells, trying to not hurt the feelings of others, while biting my lips when I'm the one that got hurt. I've lived not knowing how to say no. I've lived following the will of others, not thinking about my own will. I've lived well, a foolish life.

The realization doesn't sit well with me. Its getting harder and harder for me to wake up in the morning. My sense of purpose seems to have faded, becoming more unclear with each passing day. I need to rediscover things that are important to me, and things that are just keeping me down.

On the other hand, I am still thankful for I'm still living and breathing. Thank you Allah for another wonderful year. When everyone else fails to stand by me, I know that you're always there for me, everytime. Alhamdulillah.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

I'm okay.

These days, I'm aware that my friends might be a little worried about me. I am also aware that I've not been my usual self, which might lead them to think that something's wrong with me.

Fret not my friends. I'm okay! I'm still the normal Chak, minus all the sunshines and rainbows. I might have less smiles plastered across my face, but I'm fine.

I think I'm just a little tired though. Physically, and yes. Mentally.

I'm sorry for worrying you guys. I'm sorry if you guys think that I'm being moody, or that I'm mad at anyone. I'm sorry for not being the usual happy me. I'm sorry. But I'm fine, really. :)

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

A couple of days

Yup, a couple of days till I turn 21!! Hahaha, time goes by super fast these days sometimes I can't keep up with the days in a week. This week I am officially doomed with massive eyebags as there are six reports/assignments due!

Say what?!

Yeah, I'm going  a bit cray cray over here from lack of sleep. Can't blame me right? I've been sleeping for no more than three hours since last week, sometimes I feel like I'm sleep-walking during the day. Hehe.

To make a point of my horrible eyebags.

Moving on, to more pressing issues. I don't really feel that hyped-up about celebrating my birthday this year. Its just not as fun, or maybe because I'm currently unhappy, I don't know. I feel like I'm walking on thin ice everyday, and I hope that this kinda feelings will pass soon. But one thing for sure, I am not gonna miss watching Resident Evil: Retribution which is gonna start showing from 13th September onwards!

One of my favorite movies of all time. 

Talking about mood-lifting methods, I am super excited for our usual mid-term trip! This time we're going to Terengganu for our vacay.Still can't decide on Redang or Perhentian, but I'm totally looking forward to white sandy beach and clear sea water. I hope the weather's gonna be sunny there as it is currently rainy season here in the west coast. Wait for me Ganu, I'll be there soon!

Till then, more brain-wrecking session to catch up on.

Sunday, September 09, 2012

The love of my life

These kids. 

I am currently having a hard time trying to write my genetics essay, let alone trying to finish it by tomorrow. My thoughts are all over the place. And then I thought of my two lil brothers. If only they're here with me, they'll be the ones who'd put a smile on my face. They'll cheer me up, make me laugh, oh I miss them. I miss them like crazy! 

And so I called mom just now, talked to the kids and what not. I'm feeling a little better now that I get to talk to them. :) I miss home though. 

Wait for kakak for two more weeks, I'll be home soon. And you guys can continue driving me crazy then. I love you guys! I'll just have to endure the torture of tons of assignments before the mid semester break, but I'll be fine. I'll be okay. :)


The love-hate syndrome

I am currently suffering from this. So help me God, its really hard controlling myself in college. Trust me, I tried. Mondays to Fridays are gonna be super hard for me from now on! Gotta watch where I'm looking, what I'm saying etc.

It doesn't mean that I'm gonna stop trying! I won't, I shall just hate him if all other means do not seem to work.

I will not lose this time. I won't let the foolish me win. My pride just won't let me.

Be prepared for the ultimate battle, baby.
Hahaha. Yes, the voices did.


Saturday, September 08, 2012

Turn my happy on

“Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness.” 
― Bertrand RussellThe Conquest of Happiness

Friday, September 07, 2012


What is it with me these days?? I should REALLY stop obsessing about a guy. Yep, again. I think I'm getting more obsessed because I'm turning 21 soon. There's always this web of thoughts circling in my head around the time of my birthday. ALWAYS. Its either me whining about getting older, being single, spending my birthday alone, yada yada yada. I expect not to do it anymore this year, but I can't help it!

And the reason I'm writing this is because I'm getting more and more embarrassed about me liking that guy being out in the open. Like, really. He must've figured it out already! I should've just died out of embarrassment. Ughhh. College life. When your friends see the guy you like, they'll elbow you and call out your name. It isn't helping that my face got as red as a tomato, and that they're four to five of my friends calling out my name. Thanks guys. He knows my name now I suppose. Lol. I just died inside.

Why are you so kind anyway? Makes me like you even more. I like nice guys. I like you. Err. I'm even redder now as I'm writing this. WTF. What's wrong with me? I think I'm sick somewhere! T_T

Okay I should just stop liking him now. No more stealing looks at him in class. No more. It is always gonna be one-sided anyway, so why bother? Better to shield myself rather than get hurt in the process. Agreed?

That would likely means that I would be going to the Monash Ball without a partner.

That'd be good too, except that this is my final year in Monash.

Talking about the ball, the fat me should get my running shoes on and burn the extra kgs. Goodnight guys. I have tons of reports waiting. Don't miss me too much. Hehe.

Monday, September 03, 2012

Running out of hands

Why? Because there's very limited time to do my assignments before submission now. I was busy over the weekends for  my Kembara Raya and I attended a wedding too in Senawang. Overall, it was super fun to gather with my girls, and guys! The pictures will have to wait, this is only a short update.  Hehe. Talk to you guys soon.

The soon to be 21 girl. :)