Why is it when I care so much about someone, I become so obsessed? It's unhealthy. I hate this feeling of wanting more. I hate that the thing I'm most talented in is, is destroying the things that I have.
Hurting the ones that I love.
I say it time and time again. With every failed relationship I ask God again, "Is there something wrong with me? Why do I always like to put a dent on my own happiness, almost like an addiction?"
I want to be happy. I deserve to be happy after all these years.
So why am I sitting here, crying alone at night?
I have regrets. I push people away. Even the one who I thought will persevere after all the ugliness shows.
I will fix this. I will sleep it off and fix this. I've come so far to finally be happy, and I'm not gonna let my foolishness get in the way. Nor my ego.